Carroll's Journal #43 (STGRB)

Interestingly enough, I am still getting emails from people asking me if I am, or have ever been a member of, or a part of the STGRB (Stop The Good Reads Bullies) website. The answer is an emphatic NO!. I never was, have been or am currently associated in any capacity with that website. I have no involvement or association what-so-ever.

I just wanted to make that perfectly clear.

During the weekend of when I got “bullied” - the question was raised - if I was or ever had been a part of that website and my answer at the time was “I used to be, but was not anymore.” However, I was thinking about a different website that I thought they were asking about. By the time I figured out what they meant, it was too late to say anything. I had already been banned. Not that saying anything would have mattered, these “bullies” already had it in their minds that I was somehow connected to that website and any explanation of confusion would have been in vain, so I let it slide.

Trust me, these people who attacked me are so ignorant, perhaps stupid, to the point that they don’t want to know the truth, they just want to paint the truth to the color of their own satisfaction amidst their hatred for me. Hate is their food and they will stuff themselves to the point of obesity with it.

It was also revealed to me by a GR staff member (whom I am in friendly relations with) that the reason I got banned from Goodreads was because Patrick Brown (The GR clown) LOL thinks I am (or thought I was) involved with that website. Of course, I am not so, as Forrest Gump would say, “Stupid is as stupid does.” Ha-ha Or maybe in this case, stupid is as stupid thinks.

Anyhow, if I were associated with that website, I would be proud to be so. For as much as I can tell, it is a website dedicated to trying to “out” (and stop) the bullies. And of course, the people who hate that website are in fact, the bullies themselves. (Makes sense, right?) I mean, these bullies have roamed that website for so long (apparently) and have done this to other authors (apparently) that finally, somebody decided to stand up to them.

My confusion is this, I never had a problem with anybody about anything except for a select few who made a promise and backed out. Now, their defense has always been that they have every right to back out of those promises and that’s just the way life as a blogger/reviewer is. Okay, I understand that. I have no problem with that. But, (and this is a very big but) if you do practice that (which by their own defense of my “list” and their own admission, that they do practice that) then why are they so angry about me “outing” them and writing the truth?

It’s a mystery.

Or is it a mystery? isn’t that the definition of a “bully”? And what all those people did to me who didn’t even know me, isn’t that bullying too? Of course it is. Hence, this is why they hate STGRB website so much. (Which is why they hate so much, period!)

The funny part for me is, one of these days we may actually learn of who is behind that website and when we do, I will certainly get the last laugh. (And I hope we do learn someday, I know I would like to know who is behind it so I can thank them for all of their assistance) But like everybody else, I am left wondering who they are.

I have read many posts regarding them and their tactics. I can’t say I blame them. They are merely using the same tactics that these “bullies” or “haters” are using. If I were going to run a website like STGRB website, I would probably use those same tactics too. It’s called, “getting a taste of your own medicine.” Let us not forget that I did get some death threats and as we all know, sane people make death threats. (Sarcasm)

And how can these people claim that I bring such a dark shadow to “reviewer’s” and “book bloggers” when in fact they post book shelves called, “would rather eat my own vomit” and such gross stuff like that? I mean, any self respecting reader would see this and know that they are not dealing with a “fair” mind. And how can I be responsible for people rating and reviewing books without them even reading them? Or attacking authors in their reviews instead of attacking the book itself?

Clearly, we are not dealing with the elite of intelligence here. LOL

Just so you all know, I am working on a major journal post for the future that will explain the WHOLE situation and relationship of this girl in question and I. My inner confliction about posting it is severe. I mean, what’s the point, right? The fact is, many people probably don’t even care. As for my friends, they will stick with me regardless because they know more about me than any of these attackers. My friends couldn’t care less about what happened because they can think for themselves and realize that there are two sides to every story and situation. Both she and I are guilty on our own levels. Not to mention, the “haters” or “bullies” couldn’t care less about the evidence, they won’t look at it anyway and they will disregard it too or twist it all around to fit their “idea” of some kind of truth for them (and only them) to believe. So posting any kind of explanation just seems irrelevant at this point.

Also for the record, local authorities have already looked at all the emails she and I sent to each other and I have been cleared of any wrong doing. They found nothing “illegal” with our correspondence. (There goes the theory they had about me trying to “prey” on teens.) LOL They are also going to be turning all those emails back over to me (I think) and I am trying to decide if I should begin posting them, one by one, to show everybody that no “hanky-panky” was ever being conducted. (And to show everyone the horrible email she sent me first that I responded to and the one she is posting everywhere) It’s the only way for the “truth” to clearly come out. (I am currently in discussions with my lawyer as to whether posting these emails would be a good idea from a legal stand-point. Stay tuned for developments of these discussions.) But again, as I mentioned before, I don’t see what good will come from it. My supporters don’t care and the “haters” will dismiss it.

But as for the story of this girl (Who uses a fake name) and I, yeah, I am working on that. Once I am finished and once I make that decision to post it (or not), I will let you all know. Then you all will learn the truth, once and for all.

As for STGRB website? I haven’t a clue as to who is behind that. The best I can tell, they are doing exactly what they set out to do. A lot of people say that website has no merit, well, the bullies say that anyway, apparently, The Huffington post thinks otherwise. And you know you have arrived when you get under the skin of the GR bullies and their leader, and full endorser, Patrick Brown, when they hate that website as much as they do. Obviously, if they were not taken seriously, then nobody would take them seriously, but these people who hate them do take them seriously. And for good reason. Somebody finally took a stand against them. And while they can continue to blame me and people like me for blemishing the reputation of Goodreads, they (the bullies and GR) have nobody else to blame but themselves. They are the ones who violate the TOS and GR does nothing about it. That is how you get a bad reputation and everybody realizes that your site is a joke. Not by me or people like me, but by your own actions or lack there-of.

They also say they are going to stop reviewing books by Indie authors and laying the blame on me. Isn’t that a clever “cop-out“? Any Indie author who wants to convince themselves that I and I alone am responsible for these “reviewers” not reviewing their book and want to hate me for it, clearly lack intelligence or the capability to think for themselves. (Or both) The bottom line is this, once you get hate in your blood and in your heart, it’s in there for good. But we are talking about a bunch of people who have come up short in their lives and they live what life they do have, online. This is how they empower themselves. And while they can say that my writing sucks and my poems and songs are awful, at least I have created something that is awful, which is a lot better than not creating anything at all, like so many of them have failed to do or even the talent to do. And no self respecting author, Indie or otherwise, would get themselves caught up in this situation one way or the other. So, if you’re an author who is talking crap about me, it’s only because you are jealous of me, my talent and trying to make a name off of me to get people to buy your crappy books. LOL

So coming up in the near future, I might be posting the story about me and this girl in question, and about the emails, and about the picture. Let me know what you think, do you think it’s a good idea? (I am asking that question to my friends and supporters, not to the “anon haters”. Who cares what you think? If I have learned anything in my life it is this: “You can’t reason with hate.”

But as for my friends and supporters, I would like to hear from you on this one. Should I post the story behind everything that led to this drama? Or should I not?

Okay, that’s enough of that monkey-junk for now. Let me tell you how much fun I am having being out on the road. Man, there are a lot of beautiful places to see around Ohio, Kentucky, West Virginia area. I am having a blast.

Oh, hey, I made a slight adjustment on my “Music” page. I have added the links to all of my 20 songs I have recorded in the studio so far and each link takes you directly to that song and my Youtube channel. So take a listen if you haven’t already.

I think I have decided on a cover for my next CD (which is still a couple of tracks short of being completed) I will post it on a later date and get some input from you all. It’s a picture of me that was taken when I was getting made up to look like a zombie one Halloween day. (I had dyed my hair black for the occasion) But it looks pretty awesome. I had taken a break after we were midway through the process (which took a good few hours) and right before the blood and gore was added. (I needed a smoke break) LOL Anyhow, I like it and think it will be good for the cover. Although, I haven’t made my final decision on it yet so … I reserve the right to change my mind. Haha

I did get a very interesting email today. (Sunday, August 19^th) from a lady who works for a publishing company. She mentioned that she has been following my blog and that she likes it and finds it somewhat entertaining. She also mentioned all of my page views has gotten her attention. She also went on to tell me that she has read a couple of my books and finds them very interesting. She left a number for me to call. I told her I would call her when I returned from my little trip. I wonder what she wants to talk about? I guess I’ll find out soon enough.

She also asked me something odd. She asked what I thought about Goodreads. The only thing I told her about that is, I don’t think Goodreads is a legitimate website. It’s hard for a website that fails to enforce their TOS to have any credibility. That’s basically what I said, but also said that perhaps we could discuss it further when I call her upon my return. But again, a very interesting, if not unusual, email. Looking forward to our conversation. It’s somewhat difficult at this point to know if this request from her is from a personal perspective or a possible business perspective. Again, I suppose I will find out shortly in due time. Until then, I will just wing it and assume it’s personal. Nothing wrong in making a new friend.

David is delaying his return for a couple of months. It would appear that he has made some kind of contact with somebody in radio and mentioned something to me about doing a radio interview over the phone. He will be giving me more details later this week. What does that old dog have up his sleeve? Regardless, it appears he has been spreading the word about me around his little world in Florida. Once a manager, always a manager I reckon.

Well, that about wraps it up for me right now. I am bushed and will be hitting the sheets soon. Big day tomorrow. Plus, tomorrow night is pre-season Monday Night Football. (Football!) So be nice to each other. As always, peace and love to all.