Trust me, our law enforcement is a joke and a punchline. (Both at the same time.)
Many of you already know my run-ins with these dork-holes. Like when Officer Ratcliffe tried to get an employee of the Duchess Shoppe to file false charges against me just so he could come to my home and arrest me. What a dick-wad! lol
This is when I told my new friend, "Yeah, that's me. Although, I always thought it was the other way around, and I am watching them."
You see, when I first moved to Piketon, I was stopped walking back from the store (with bags in my hand) by Officer Ratcliffe. He watched me walk down the hill from my home and to the store, where I entered, and shortly thereafter, exited and headed the same way back home. But according to officer Ratcliffe, and the rest of the Piketon "Keystone" police, that was enough suspicious activity from me to warrant a "stop".
Ever since that night, we (the Piketon police, and I) have been at odds. We don't like each other, not one bit. There are / were a couple officers I am okay with, but for the most part, chief "Wiggums" and another officer, officer Jenkins, are a couple of dinkle-dorfs who may have watched one too many Steven Seagal movies or something.
But the fact that this new guy on the block starts talking with me and we become friends and then he mentions how the cops around here "warned" him about me - in a way - and told him about me is very funny. It means that I am living rent free inside their heads. It means they know I am watching them to make sure they are not harassing the citizens anymore. And when they tell others that "they are watching me", the truth is, "I am watching them".
The Piketon police may be dumb-asses, but they are dangerous. They are dangerous because they practice "rights violations". And for the people they target, it's hard for them to stand up to them because of their police records of the past, so I take it upon my shoulders to try and look out for - not just them - but all citizens. I try to protect them as best I can from a corrupt police force. I do this because I can. Because I do not have a police record. I do this also because I believe all police should have someone watching them, making sure they stay in line themselves. All police need to be policed. It's way too easy to abuse their authority. And trust me, most of them do. The good ones turn away from it.
Ratcliffe went on to get a job with the Waverly police shortly after he and mine scuffle. Jism-jaws Jenkins (Ricky) still patrols the town, but with a watchful eye on him. (My eye.) Chief "Wiggums" Nelson still scarfs down the donuts at record pace. And as for mayor Billy Spencer, well, I don't know what the hell his problem is or why he allows the police to harass the citizens, but that is the life here in this town. If you ever move here, just count the days before they see you and target you for one their little harassment games. Until then, this is SUPER CITIZEN Carroll Bryant keeping an eye on the SUPER COPS of the village of Piketon in Piketon, Ohio.
Ya'll come back now ...... ya here?
And P.S. "Wiggums", if you or your officers have anything to say about me, come say it to my face. Bitches.