Carroll's Journal: Beautiful Delirium

I heard my old Goodreads group has officially been deleted. I don’t know how to feel about that. Except to say that some people were holding on too close. It’s just a group. Or, it was just a group. However, there were a lot of memories there. I will probably always remember the amazing young people I got to meet and hopefully, helped. I have had quite a few emails telling me that Goodreads dropped several “class points” when I got the proverbial boot. Hell, I could have told you that, LOL

 

Aaahhhhhh, beautiful delirium.

 

Seriously though, I will remember the great times I had on there with many of you. We had a lot of fun and laughs, as well as dropped a few tears. We solved some problems and had more than our share of drama. They say, all good things must come to an end. And sometimes, even great things must come to an end. It was a year to remember, that’s for sure. If you’re looking for someone to blame, there is plenty to go around. So, pass the mashed-potatoes & gravy and let’s start feasting!

 

My thoughts may be wireless, but my brain constantly needs recharging.

 

That sentence first appeared to me while counting pixie dust particles in a forest of sweet enchantment. While wireless thoughts is a good concept in theory, the fact remains that everything transmitted through my mind can be captured in a black-box located somewhere in a tower near you. They are isolated from the rest of the world. Sure, this appears relevant at first glance, but after a second peek, you realize how familiar it looks in association to your mother-in-law, and let’s face it, that can’t be good.

 

Did I throw you off with that paragraph? Ha-ha.

 

Recently, I attempted to seriously address some issues with one of the bullies on her blog. I don’t know what it is that makes me think I can reach out and connect with people’s humanity. For some reason, I get it in my head that everybody has an ounce of decency in them and yet, every single time I give these people the opportunity to prove they do, they let me down. Now I fear I have another stalker who is madly in love with me. Someone keeps posting on her blog, all kinds of stuff about me but, all it is - is my comments. Comments that I make on STGRB and here on my blog. I don’t get it.

 

Damn me and my animal magnetism!

 

Anyhow, it is really a shame when grown adults want to play silly childish games that even my six year old nephew has out-grown. Sometimes I want to become a Christian just to pray for other people’s souls. Speaking of my nephew, I miss him. Haven’t seen him for a while. I should go pay him a visit soon.

 

You know, there are a lot of people in this world who can’t seem to grasp the concept that we are all human. And sometimes, by being human, we are going to make mistakes. Trust me, we are all going to make more than our fair share of them too. The beauty of this is: when you do make them, wouldn’t it be nice if people could move past them? Believe me, there’s a lot of people on the internet world who just can’t seem to let the past go. These people need to learn how to move on. (You know who you are) If you ever expect to be forgiven for your mistakes, you’re going to have to learn to forgive others. A lot of you out there are still clinging to things better left un-clung? However, if it makes you feel God-like to keep hanging on and posting about me, commenting about me, stalking me or whatever, then knock yourselves out. Just remember, when it’s your turn to be forgiven, you can look pass me to give it. There’s a pretty good chance I won’t forgive you. Why? Because I’m still human. To receive, you must also give. But to give, you have to have the heart for it.

In case any of you were wondering, I took down my Youtube videos addressing the bullies situation. I did this about 5 or 6 weeks ago. The consensus was that they were overshadowing the music. You can still keep up with all of the bully activity over at STGRB. They are doing a fine job at reporting all of their shenanigans. Also, I decided not to give them (the bullies) anymore free publicity. If you are a religious person, pray for the bullies. They could certainly use all the prayers they can get. They are very troubled people and after reading several articles about internet bullies, I have come to realize that many of these people could be suffering from some form of mental illness. Being one who has been diagnosed with bi-polar, I have become quite compassionate towards people with mental conditions. Don’t hate them, just hate their actions.

 

I want to take this time to thank the many of you who have been sending me links to a certain new bully blog that has appeared in recent weeks. I do not know who they are or why they have decided to target me. I appreciate the concern and the fact that some of you have told me that you reported that site to the proper authorities for “cyber bullying”. I appreciate the continued support, but I have bigger and better things to concentrate on at the moment. I have been to that blog in it’s initial conception and after having interacted with them, came to the conclusion that they were just a couple of people thirsting for some attention. I myself do not find them worthy of being mentioned. I thought I might actually find some kind of evidence that would support their claims but as like the rest of the people who spread rumors about me, they have nothing. Just a lot of hot air dribble and baseless opinions. I am quite confident that for anybody who stumbles onto that site, they will clearly see that it is a blog operated and run by the bullies from the website Goodreads.

 

Anyhow, I am getting prepared to travel west. A little Vegas, and some California – will do a Carz good right about now. I should get a haircut before I leave. Not to worry, I have scheduled some really good posts for you all to enjoy. They'll be popping up every couple of days so it will be like I'm not even gone.  

 

 

 

Various Cruelties - "Beautiful delirium"