Sunday, October 21, 2012

Carroll's Journal (Montage)

I have discovered the fountain of youth! Juan Ponce de Leon was looking in all the wrong places. In fact, everyone was. (Is). The fountain of youth lives inside of your heart and mind. This is my claim as I spoke it to a special friend recently. We were caught up in our “groove” not too long ago and in the middle of the after-glow, we started talking about my many childhoods. (Yes, I have had several of them in fact)

It all started with my original one. (Obviously) and that lasted for a good 17 years. Then came my second one in the Navy. A few short years, but very memorable nonetheless. Upon my return, I went through childhood number three basically with my little sister, and it continued on through with my nephew and niece of my oldest sister. Childhood number four came when I met Vincent Crowley and David. No sooner did that one fade away when number five popped up in the form of my youngest nephew, Caden.

He is going to grow up someday and I will have to go in search of number six. Jenny keeps telling me that it will be with her. Yeah, she’s not the greatest when it comes to predicting the future. Foresight is not her strong suit. Hindsight, on the other hand, is. LOL Still, about the turn of the month, I must have ate a bad burrito and got sick. Mostly just nausea, but enough to kill my appetite for a few days or so. Fortunately, I did not toss my cookies. I haven’t done that since New Years Eve 1997. My 15 year streak is still safe.

Anyhow, during the first ten days of September, because of the nausea taking away my appetite, I actually dropped a good seven pounds. Not that I really needed to, but it doesn’t hurt, does it? And with that came a little more energy and all the feel good feelings that comes along with getting in just a little better shape. My workouts have picked up also, getting that stamina back that I lost while recovering from that auto accident so many years ago. I think I have finally gotten over that hurdle, and turned the corner. The nightmares don’t come around as often as they used to. My body is starting to click again.

Not to mention, all this talk about getting into acting, I think there is a vibe happening here and it’s motivating me down the road of a new path. There has been numerous changes abound the past year or two, the biggest being my father walking out on everyone. At first, I was shell shocked, but now - good riddance. Then all that childish drama that was brought to me by the internet nuts and with it, getting booted off GR. (Another blessing in disguise.) That freed me from an addiction that kept me sitting most of the day and inactive. Then came the loss of my friend and manager. I hope he is doing well wherever he may be. Since then, doors are opening and I have been getting active again in my travels and plans.

There is still a lot going on at the moment.

Life changes on its own and at its own pace. I was so afraid of change for so long. Maybe it was the result of my accident, I don’t know. But for now, I am embracing those changes. They occurred for a reason. I have to walk where life is leading me. Meanwhile, I am in the middle of my fifth childhood and loving every minute of it. Just don’t disturb this groove.

Now if only I could do something about these zombie dreams. The first one had three girls whom I know come racing across my yard. I was looking out of my window at the time. I opened my door to say hello and they had terrified looks upon their faces. Two of the girls I like very much. One as a friend and the other maybe as something more. The third girl is someone whom I know hates my guts and I don’t exactly think highly of her either. They rush to me and cling like vines, smothering me in hugs. I thought it might be one of them “sexy” dreams,

*Cue porn soundtrack* Chicka-bow-wow-bow-wow-chicka-bow-wow*

But to my dismay, they told me they were running from the zombies. (Yes, even girls I don’t particularly care for can be in my “sexy” dreams.) So I started to laugh and tell them that there are no such thing as zombies. Then I look to my right and see some walking towards us. “Okay, so I stand corrected.”

I lead the girls down the hill and to the gas station. I got a bright idea to barricade ourselves in there, but first, we have to put up a little fight. Try and take out as many as we can. Kill the dead, so to speak. I knew I only needed one of their help while the other two girls worked on the inside to set up the barricade. I kind of already knew that who ever helped me on the outside ran a chance of not surviving so I chose the girl that I knew hated me to help me outside.

While the other two girls ran inside to do their job, me and the girl that I am not too fond of worked to form our boundary outside by removing the gas pump nozzles and start spraying fuel all over the place. Pretty soon, we were swarmed with zombies all around us. In order for me to make it back to the building to get a lighter from inside to ignite the fuel, I needed to keep the zombies busy. Now here is where it gets tricky. I somewhat nudged the girl hard enough in so that she would fall down and while the zombies were busy eating her, I could buy enough time to get the lighter and …. Anyhow, a sacrifice had to be made. I had to save me and the other two girls. Sometimes you have to sacrifice one for the sake of the group. The plan worked and just as the fire ignited and started burning the zombies, I woke up.

My life has been hectic ever since. Everything has fallen apart. How could I have done that to that girl? I should have thought up of some other way and tried to save her too. Instead, I just threw her out there to be devoured by those flesh eating dead-humans. I need to get myself together. But there just doesn’t seem to be enough time to do it so I am going to call upon an 80’s montage. You can get a lot done with a montage.

Okay, now I feel a lot better.

I’ll tell you one thing though, ever since ‘Blogger’ made their “upgrade” - it has been hard to post. Everything runs slower than molasses. It takes forever and a day to post anything anymore. Now, I am just talking off the top of my head here, but I thought “upgrades” were supposed to be “improvements”. Yeah, that didn’t happen here. Let’s face it, 99 percent of all “upgrades” are really downgrades. Anyhow, what you gonna do? Basically, there is nothing you can do but grin and bear it. Still, I miss the old format. Now, you guys may not be able to see it as this so called “upgrade” is from the admin part of the blog. Maybe some of you have a blog through ‘Blogger’ and know what I am talking about. It just takes so long to post anymore and to navigate through your admin section. Well, anyhow, I thought about complaining then figured they probably have gotten enough of those and already know. In which case, there’s probably nothing they can do about it now. They already made the switch and may not want to switch back. And I have zoomed past 200,000 page-views (Thank you all) and that is a huge milestone. I just never thought this blog would be so popular. Not in my wildest imagination. So it would be pointless to jump start another one now. Right? Not to mention, I am excited to see if I clear 300,00 views as my first year with this blog is approaching in a few months. (Wow, has it been ten months already?) LOL I stand by that old saying: “If it aint broke, don’t fix it.” Because chances are, you’ll end up breaking it. Come on Blogger, why did you go and mess up a good thing for? Geesh. LOL

This is me grinning and bearing it.

I nearly had an auto accident returning from my nephews birthday party. Some ignorant girl with a female passenger. There was a merge in the road and at the last moment, she decided she wanted to merge right with me. The only problem was, she was in the left lane and had to cut in front of me with no warning whatsoever. I swerved to miss her and my ass end tagged an orange highway cone, doing some minor damage to my rear fender and bumper at a cool 55 miles an hour. The stupid … stupid … girl (I wanted to say something else) kept going and didn’t even stop. Turns out I have to pay 300 hundred dollars to get it repaired. Thanks … girl. I do have her license plate number and I have reported it to the police. With no witnesses, if she denies it happened then there is nothing I can do. (Oh really now?) Karma is a bitch lady. *Wink*. Merry Christmas. LOL Ho-ho-ho. Karma is my alias.

Information is knowledge and knowledge is power. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

She also broke my camera. I had it with me at my nephew’s birthday party and it got sloshed around and ended up on the floorboard. That’s another couple hundred of bucks! That girl is so gonna pay! It’s not about the money, it’s about the fact that she didn’t even bother pulling over to see if I was okay or to see if she caused any damage. Now she is running from it. But she will learn, she can’t run from it because I will catch up to her in due time. I am karma. Decent people need not to worry about me. All the rest? Hell yes!

*** Chicka-bow-wow-bow-wow-chicka-bow-wow ***

Oh, wrong theme music. There are only a few things that suck in Ohio. (In my opinion) But the worst thing is that people here do not know how to drive. They drive like they are always on crack. Yeah, Ohioans suck at driving for the most part. They always seem to be in a hurry or just plain don’t know where they are going or how to get there. Which is funny because there is nothing in Ohio worth being in such a hurry to get to.

It won’t take long to track that girl down. I can use an 80’s montage to make it all go faster.

Update: The police did find her and asked her about it. As expected, she denied it ever took place. The cop that spoke to her is an acquaintance of mine through my father and he suspected from what she was saying that she wasn’t telling the truth. She mentioned something about that if she were involved in something like that - that she would have pulled over because she has insurance and everything. Anyhow, that response led him to go with his gut and so he told her that all he needed to do now was check her insurance papers and he would be on his way. Low and behold, she could not provide those papers. Turns out, there was a reason for that, she doesn’t have insurance. Now, her license will be suspended for at least a month (maybe more) and she will have to pay a fine and court costs plus a penalty for not having insurance and she will have to get it within 30 days or risk losing her license for an additional 60 days and … well … karma has arrived. Her ship is sunk. Total cost to her for this whole ordeal? About 400 or 500 dollars.

Now we’re square … girl! (Still wanting to call her something else) LOL (Almost) … Yikes!

*** Chicka-bow-wow-bow-wow-chicka-bow-wow *** Whoops, wrong theme music again.

Always remember that you can hook up with me on Facebook and Twitter 1 or Twitter 2  Why two twitters? Well, for some blasted reason, I can’t send any tweets out on my original account but I can re-tweet on it so I made a second one that I actually use to tweet with then I sign into my original account and re-tweet what I tweeted. (Keeping up so far?) And why don’t I just delete my original account? I have over 1400 followers on it, that’s why.


And go to Clover Quotes and check out all of my …… quotes. LOL

Random thought: “She thinks she’s a ten. That’s what makes her a one.” (A no one, that is)

Oh, before I forget, HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! And remember, if you find yourself trapped with three girls (and one of them hates you and you don’t really like her either) and you’re being chased by zombies, unless you’re prepared to go through an 80’s montage, do not sacrifice the girl who hates you to save the two girls who like you. But if you’re okay with the montage, yeah, go ahead, make the sacrifice. Knock yourself out.

I’m starting to think that dreams are nothing but a real life montage.

Here are the lyrics if you would like to sing along.

The day is approaching to give it your best,
You've got to reach your prime
That's when you need to put yourself to the test,
And show us a passage of time
We're gonna need a montage! (MONTAGE!)
A sports training montage! (MONTAGE!)
Show a lot of things happening at once,
Remind everyone of what's going on! (WHAT'S GOING ON!)
With every shot show a little improvement,
To show it all would take too long!
That's called a montage! (MONTAGE!)
Even Rocky had a montage! (MONTAGE!)
In any sport if you want to go,
From just a beginner to a pro
You need a montage! (MONTAGE!)
A simple little montage! (MONTAGE!)
Always fade out in a montage
If you fade out it seems like more time has a passed in a montage

Holy crap! Three girls are running across my lawn. I’ll … hit you guys up later. I gotta go.

*Cue porn soundtrack* Chicka-bow-wow-bow-wow-chicka-bow-wow*

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