Thursday, December 15, 2016

Rash On My Ass - By Carroll Bryant

RASH ON MY ASS - By Carroll Bryant


I got a rash on my ass on Christmas morning 
I know it wasn't there on Christmas Eve
Santa was suppose to stuff the stockings
But instead I think that he stuffed me

When I was a kid I heard a rumor
In fact, you know, I think I can recall
Someone said that Santa had some problems
He was addicted to some drugs and alcohol 

At first I didn't want to believe it
I got mad and simply walked away 
Because the rumors got so fucking stupid
The moment someone said that he was gay

I got a rash on my ass on Christmas morning 
I know it wasn't there on Christmas Eve
Santa was suppose to stuff the stockings
But instead I think that he stuffed me

And so I decided to investigate 
Just to try and see what I could find
After talking to some elves and the reindeer 
What I did discover blew my mind

It really was a shock to my system
What to think and what not to believe
And So I guess there's only one solution
Just never go to sleep on Christmas Eve

I got a rash on my ass on Christmas morning 
I know it wasn't there on Christmas Eve
Santa was suppose to stuff the stockings
But instead I think that he stuffed me

I got a rash on my ass on Christmas morning 
I know it wasn't there on Christmas Eve

Ho, ho, ho ... ho, ho, ho, Santa Claus is ....... dead!






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